I tell you what, my body just don’t function the way it used to. Even when I was 50, I could still hold my own against those snot nosed privates who wanted to tangle with the Gunny, but today I lost a fight against a front step.
When I’m getting’ your knickers back to ya’ I treat it like a high level military extraction. I get in the truck, I get to your doorstep and I get out, the quicker the better. When no ones lookin’ I even dive behind a bush or two.
Let me set the scene for you. It was the last drop off of the day. I saved my best stuff for this last stop because it had all the elements of a high value target: Wedding dress, long driveway, dog. I stopped the engine fifty yards from the drive and coasted in silence to the extraction point. I watched my second hand tick toward the 12, then I sprang into action. I was out my door and had the wedding dress out of the back in less than five seconds. There were no enemy targets in view, so I went quick and low along the hedge line to the front door. I’ve been to this house many times so I knew to hang the clothing on the porch light. I looked at my watch again, 24 seconds, a new record. Getting in, however, is only half the operation. I checked the perimeter again, no unfriendlies, I was out of there again, quick and low. The only thing I left out of my perfect plan was the final step off the front porch and onto the driveway. It caught me while I was looking to my 3 o’clock and I went down hard.
Now I’m at home with my swollen ankle in a tub of ice. I told Jenny it was a pot hole on the street but I don’t think she believes me. Lets just keep all the running around and diving behind bushes between you and I how ‘bout?
Comments Off
